Sunday, September 20, 2015

Even Later Life Can Surprise You - by Joannah Merriman

I was t he flrst of 30 cousins on my mother's side of the family, a readymade extrovert . From the time I was a preschooler until I left home for college, I was the ” big sister,‘ often taking care of babies in my own house and in the lake houses of my uncles and their families.

 Born to an Italian mother and a Lebanese father, I was full of family, delicious food, and boisterous conversation as a child. No demure ladies' teas for me. My parent s loved and nurtured my siblings and me, though my father gave me strange half-encouragement about spreading my wings: ” You can be anything you want to be . . . as long as you get married and have children, as all real women should.‘ I did want children but didn't want  to be stuck in the Midwest forever.

A good writer, voracious reader, decent pianist , accomplished swimmer, I was never much for strenuous out door activities. I was a bit of a klutz, so running and hiking were not activities to which I was drawn. I loved horses but never achieved my dream of riding to school on my own glossy, black Tennessee Walker. A good Catholic girl, I got married right out of college, exactly as I was expected to do. I had never thought too far into my future past the college degree, marriage, children.

Surprising myself began when I moved t o Denver in1969 with my psychology degree, accompanying my first husband, fresh out of law school. Then to Fort Collins in early 1974 with a future second husband, father of my children,  to open a retail record store, then three, and finally a chain of eight .

During my 46 years in Colorado, I have taught childbirth education and completed t wo master's degrees but couldn't seem to stay married. When my second marriage ended in divorce nearly 30 years ago, I was content t o be a single parent . I began walking to manage stress. Nothing strenuous. Just step by step.

However, in 1988 I met a wonderful man, a big surprise, and settled into a surprising, loving life with him, teaching, writing, caring for my three children, two cats, and four golden retrievers.

In August 2013, I began the Camino de Santiago, a 500-mile walk from the French Pyrenees to the western Spanish coast , with a backpack and a pair of hiking sticks. Solo.  Me, the hiking-avoidant extrovert.  My friends and my partner were stunned. ” You?‘ they said? ” You?‘ ” Yes, me,‘ answered my own astonished self. I want ed six weeks of solitude in an unfamiliar place, and I got it . As is my habit , I began writing about my thoughts and preparations months before I departed. Captured it on a website for any interest ed people to see. This year I will walk 500 miles again, on another path but still following the Camino to Santiago de Compostela. It seems  he older I get, the better my life becomes. Now that's a surprise.

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