She: Wait a minute. The romance really started in San Francisco when your younger son informed me that just before she died, his mom told you to marry me. That was a surprise even though we had been friends for 20 years. I had been a widow for seven years and needed to know if we could become more than friends.
He: I had not been a widower that long, but long enough to realize what so many of our age have experienced in losing a spouse. I also knew that since we had both been blessed by long, happy marriages — 32 years in your case and 42 in mine — we both knew what it means to cherish memories and love and yet move on to new lives.
She: We took enough time to explore our relationship before I crossed the line at the Alamo. I learned how generous you were both to me and my children and I think you learned that I could deal with adversity and we had similar senses of humor. That really was the beginning.
He: Now in our 80’s we still make time for romance but it looks a little different. As people age and hair thins, bellies bulge, hearing goes and we keep losing our keys, we need to remember that love is patient and kind and forgiveness is more important than ever.
She: And loving involves being attentive to the little things. I really appreciate your doing the dishes after dinner so I can answer my email. There is nothing like playing and exercising and working together as a team.
He: And enduring love should be more than gazing adoringly into each other’s eyes. It also means directing our vision and efforts toward causes in the community beyond ourselves as an expression of our shared spirituality.
She: Definitely, but we need to spice up the romance too. I love that you often suggest sitting down in the living room by the fireplace with a glass of wine and a snack to talk about the day’s events or think of travel adventures we would both enjoy. Our weekly date nights with dinner out and a movie or a play give us another chance to celebrate life together
He: Romance certainly includes intimacy. We know that “making love” is more than sexual relations. Couples of any age need to remember that the best four letter definition of intercourse is talk. Communication, which also means truly listening, keeps relationships growing.
She: We know that healthy people even in their later years can enjoy happy, fun, intimate relationships. He and She: Both of us, in the lyrics from Funny Girl, want to always be able to say, “Make each day Valentine’s Day!”
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